Sometime ago myself and Mrs Crinklybee formed the Don't Let Sundays Get You Down Club, with the aim of organising diverting domenical activities to protect us from the end-of-the-weekend blues, and in particular from the dreaded possibility of finding ourselves watching Songs of Praise while looking out of the window at the drizzle and thinking about doing the ironing. From these inauspicious beginnings the club extended its remit, and in its third year of operation was proud to announce that, in addition to avoiding the televised teatime hymnal, its members had remained blissfully unaware of an entire series of Last of the Summer Wine reruns, and had tuned in to Antiques Roadshow only twice.
The DLSGYD club has organised a wide variety of activities, including games of tennis, all-you-can-eat Chinese buffets, and in one perhaps misguided occasion, an educational visit to the launderette. However it was in 2002, with the innovative purchase of National Trust cards for all card-holding members (in other words for himself and Mrs Crinklybee) that the club treasurer (yours truly) really launched the club into new territory. Membership of DLSGYD now brings with it a passport to any number of vast English country estates that, if you were foolish enough to allow Sundays To Get You Down, you would only experience as the luscious backdrop to a Jane Austen dramatisation on BBC2. Just like your TV Licence, your National Trust card allows you to have a look inside the houses and see how the other half lived in Victorian times- but unlike on the telly, you can also bring your walking boots and set off on an ambitious six-mile hike across the grounds- or if you prefer (and let's face it we do, here at DLSGYD) a very short walk, once around the lake then straight into the amply-stocked teashop.
This year has been an historic one for DLSGYD, as the addition to the ranks of baby Frank has seen membership increase overnight by 50%. Yesterday the new recruit, resplendent in yellow babygro, tiny blue anorak and pram ensemble, made his debut on the club scene on the occasion of an outing to Gawthorpe Hall, Lancashire. A brisk perambulation in the grounds was followed by a leisurely pot of tea and a full English picnic, then, in a departure from custom, a lie-on-the-back-naked-kicking-legs-in-the-air-while-gurgling-excitedly (strictly new members only). A spot for these activities was not hard to come by, as on this slightly inclement afternoon (it was pissing it down) the grounds were deserted but for the presence of a coachload of elderly Geordies, who, to judge by their extensive knowledge of National Trust teashops and their transport- a luxury charabang leased from a firm in Sunderland and decorated with a picture of a rampant panther- appeared to be members of a shadowy but well-financed organisation even more dedicated to the consumption of home-made scones than our own.
We are forever thinking ahead here at the DLSGYD club, and perhaps in years to come we will affiliate ourselves to some sinister clique of geriatric Geordie teashop fanciers and travel in style the length and breadth of the land in search of new scone-munching experiences. But for now we declare ourselves satisfied with a committed membership of three, a Fiat Punto.... and our National Trust cards. There will be many days out to come, as our resolve remains as high as when the club was formed all those years ago. While there are tea-shops still to discover in this land of ours, and scones to devour with jam..... We Will Never, Ever Let Sundays Get Us Down.
...poor frank :^(...I'm sorry but I have visions of my own parents dragging me along chunks of the pennine walk on sundays...we'd drive to one place, drop a car off, drive to another place and then walk to the first car, drive back to the second car, drive home - oh, what fun :^)...
Posted by: billy | July 14, 2004 at 11:27 AM
Hell Billy, how many cars do you need here? Is there some kind of byelaw on the Pennine Walk banning turning around, or walks starting and ending in the same place?
Don't worry about young Frank by the way, I am sure as soon as he is old enough to walk he will be leaving his fuddy-duddy parents and their national trust cards behind and going off spray-painting bus shelters with his mates on Sundays. At least I damn well hope so.
Posted by: jonathan | July 14, 2004 at 12:21 PM
...gotta lurve my parents - remember this was back in the days before pollution was invented :^)...during my childhood my parents completed several of these walks in this method - I have also walked the length of hadrian's wall in two weeks, using two cars :^)...my father was methodical in his planning and breaking down each challenge into manageable chunks for his wife and children :^)...
(he was probably a bit loony)
Posted by: billy | July 15, 2004 at 07:27 PM